Why Students Need to Stop Studying for the PSAT

 I do more than ADHD coaching.  I’m also a tutor.  I work on the Wyzant platform (if you are looking for me) and I tutor high school and college students in English and the humanities.  Fall is a busy time for tutors.  The students have started new classes and it takes about a month to start falling behind or to realize you are in over your head.  It’s also time for college admission essays.  On top of that, it’s time for the PSAT.  I hate the PSAT.  Well, not the test.  I have problems with the test, but I don’t hate it.  I hate how it’s handled.  Many schools just tell students when they will be taking the PSAT and they do that on short notice, unlike the SAT or ACT, which is scheduled and planned for months in advance.  Which isn’t to say that nobody knows it’s coming.  It’s coming.  You’ve known that since 7th grade.  Somewhere between mid-October and mid-November, the PSAT will be given.  It happens every year.  You know what else happens every year?  Requests to help students cram for the PSAT.  Students find out that the PSAT will be given in two weeks or one week or (as happened to a student of mine this semester) two days.  This seems really unfair.  It is certainly shocking.  It definitely causes a lot of anxiety.  But it’s not unfair.  And here’s why it’s not unfair: You can’t study for the PSAT. 

I know, I’m gonna get backlash from that.  But it’s true.  It’s just not that kind of test.  It’s not a test of knowledge; it’s a test of skills.  Now, it is perfectly possible to improve one’s reading, writing, and math skills.  But that isn’t really done by studying; it’s done by practice.  If you want to be a better reader, read.  If you want to be a better writer, write.  If you want to be better at math… okay, study the formulas.  But once you know them, then all you can do is do the math.  What you absolutely can’t do is cram.  There’s nothing to cram.  You can practice and should, but that should just be part of learning.  If you can’t pick out the main idea of a reading passage, there’s nothing that can be done in 72 hours that will change that.  Just like an IQ test, the PSAT measures how you think and process information.

The PSAT is like an IQ test in another very important way.  They’re both meaningless.  The IQ test has no scientific basis and cannot measure how well a person can learn and the PSAT has no scientific basis and cannot measure how well a person has learned.  Really, the only thing the PSAT measures is how well you might do on the SAT.  And that’s all it’s supposed to measure.  That P stands for Practice.  The PSAT is there to help you learn what areas you might want to improve before taking the SAT.  But you can’t study for the SAT either.  Which is why the PSAT is given at least one year in advance of the SAT.  To give students time to improve their skills, not learn new material.
And not doing well on the PSAT or SAT does not predict college (or life) success.  If you want to know how well you will do in college, then look at how well you did in high school.  College isn’t a collection of standardized tests; it’s a collection of classes.  GPA is a better indicator of how well a student will do in college.  But even that… college is different than high school.  In many ways, it’s more flexible and more adaptable.  Students who don’t do well in high school may thrive in college because they get to create their schedule, pick their classes, determine their own path.  And some who do well in high school flounder in college for the same reasons.  What is most likely to help students succeed in college is support.  If a student goes to a college that fits their passions and personality, if a student has friends and family to lean on in the hard times, if a student takes advantage of the services colleges provide, that is going to determine if they thrive.
Let’s take some of the pressure off of our high school students.  Stop studying for the PSAT.  Use those scores for what they are meant for, to see if there are areas where skills can be improved.  Work on improving those skills, if you like.  But the PSAT does not determine a child’s future.  Stop acting like it does.

Stop Hiding: How Denying ADHD is Hurting Your Child and Everyone Else

I have been working with a student for a couple months whose stated goal is to get straight As.  In pursuit of that, she and I meet 4 or 5 times a week and do two-hour sessions of body doubling.  Since we’ve been doing this, she has caught up on all of her past due assignments and has gotten to and is maintaining an A average.  I’m really proud of her.   
As I am setting up my business, I am working on my blog and website and various other marketing stuff that I can’t stand, but, you know, you gotta do what you gotta do.  So, I asked the mother of this student if she would be willing to write a review for me.  The mother responded that she would be happy to do that, but that she didn’t want anyone to know that her daughter has ADHD and is getting help, so could she please write her review anonymously.  I responded that, of course, I understand and that all my reviews have only a first name and a location.   
But that was a lie.  Not the part about using just a first name and location.  That’s the truth.  The lie was that I understood.  I don’t.  I don’t understand even a little bit. 
Okay, a little bit.  I understand that the mother is trying to shield her daughter from the stigma and discrimination that she imagines her daughter will face if there is an ADHD label.  What I don’t understand is why she thinks that is a good or necessary thing to do.  I’m not going to say that there isn’t a stigma against having ADHD.  There is.  Announcing that you have ADHD can make life difficult in school, work, and social situations.  Some people think of ADHD as a behavioral issue or a lack of character.  Some people.  But is the stigma greater than or less than everyone thinking that.  Because some people know that ADHD is real and they understand that there is a real struggle going on.  Without that ADHD diagnosis, there is no reason for people to see the symptoms of ADHD as anything besides personal choice.  And worse yet, so will the person who has ADHD. 

The only way hiding ADHD will work to reduce the amount of stigma a person faces is for that person to then pretend to be “normal.”  So, not only does this person have to fight through their ADHD and pretend to be something they aren’t, they have to do that without help and without the support of those who understand.  Every symptom is now seen as a shortcoming by those around them.  And that will be internalized.  How could it not be? 
Hiding a disability, any disability, puts an unreasonable amount of pressure on the person hiding.  And shame.  We don’t hide things that aren’t shameful.  Why would we?  The mere act of denying ADHD creates the stigma that one is trying to avoid.  It proves to the person who is suffering that what is happening to them is their own fault and something that set them apart.  When we ask our children to hide who they are, we are telling them to hate themselves.  We are telling them that their core nature is unacceptable and won’t be tolerated.  We are telling society that we agree that ADHD is a character flaw. I am imploring all parents out there, out your children; out yourself.  When we are open and honest, we create an environment where discussions can be had and help can be gotten.  Teach your child that it is acceptable to be different.  Because if you don’t actively do that then you are actively teaching them that they are not acceptable. 

Blowing Sunshine: Why Realism and Honesty Matter When Talking About ADHD

 I’m going to go out on a limb here.  I’m about to buy myself a world of trouble.  Here goes: 

ADHD is NOT a superpower. 

Yeah, I know, right?!?!?  This sounds really weird coming from an ADHD coach, from a self-proclaimed “giant bouncy ball of sunshine,” from someone whose wardrobe consists of a few pairs of jeans and dozens of positive message tee-shirts.  But this is so important.  It is beyond belief important that we not go around blowing sunshine up our own asses.  This toxic positivity has to stop.  It’s hurting people.  
Superpowers make your life easier.  ADHD is a neurological condition and it makes your life harder.  Don’t get me wrong… that doesn’t mean it can’t make your life better.  It absolutely can.  But better is not the same as easier.  In order for ADHD to make your life better, you do have to do some hard work.  Calling ADHD a superpower belittles that hard work.  It minimizes the everyday struggle that people with ADHD go through.  It trivializes achievements, big and small.  And we don’t want to do that.  There is a voice in the back of the ADHD mind that does that for us.  That voice tells us that what we do is beneath recognition, is too simple to be celebrated, is just the bare minimum and that’s not good enough.  We really don’t need to add to that voice.  If we had superpowers then getting through the day should be simple, creating a successful and happy life should take little to no effort.  But getting through the day is hard and creating a life, any life, is an overwhelming task. 
Calling ADHD a superpower dismisses the pain it causes and the lives it devastates.  Just look at these statistics: 

People with ADHD are fighting to get through the day and they’re being told how they have superpowers.  How is that going to make you feel?  Not good.  Not successful.  Not happy.  It puts an extreme amount of pressure on you.  Pressure you don’t need from the outside because you get enough of that from the inside.  If you had superpowers, life would be easy (except when you are called upon to save NYC from aliens; you had other plans) and life isn’t easy.  It’s okay to acknowledge that.  It’s okay to call ADHD what it is. 
ADHD is a DISABILITY. 

I know… I just said a nasty thing.  I’m going to get hate mail.  I know I will because I have before.  But I stand by the statement because it is a simple fact.  It is not an opinion.  It is not a metaphor.  It is not hyperbole.  ADHD is a neurological condition that impairs function.  That is a disability.  It should be treated like one.  You need help.  And that’s okay!  Calling ADHD a superpower stops people from getting the help they need because they think it’s not okay.  They think they shouldn’t need help.  Afterall, they have superpowers, why would they need help?   People feel as if they should be able to handle everything life throws at them and are devastated when they can’t.  That devastation can lead to depression, self-loathing, and even suicide. 
And, frankly, it’s a little disrespectful to people with other disabilities.  Okay, it’s way disrespectful.  Beyond the pale.  It doesn’t reduce stigma; it shifts it.  Basically, to deny that ADHD is a disability is to say that you don’t want yourself or someone you love to be put into a category with “those people.”  As if there’s something shameful about having a disability.  It announces that having a disability is something that is embarrassing and disgraceful.  Something that shouldn’t be talked about in polite company.   
So, let’s just stop it.  Let’s stop trying to make ADHD pretty.  It isn’t.  It’s painful and stressful and difficult to live with.  Let’s be honest.  Because when we are honest, we open the door to support and help.  When we are truthful, we take some of the pressure off.  When we are realistic, we can look at the positives and find joy in them.  If we stop trying to blow sunshine, we can find the actual light. 

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